[Businessmtg] (no subject)

[Apryl Schneider]

The only thing I'm in favor of is streamlining the newcomer info a bit to make the letters and instructions more user friendly and less overwhelming. I don't think that segregating off topic posts to a different list makes sense as we all have utilized the off topic post and have also responded to someone's call for ESH. The only way someone learns the ropes of Al-Anon is through attendance and guidance. We were all new once. We have all been devastated and in need of comfort. We've all needed to vent. None of us walked into these rooms happy and ready to follow a myriad of rules. While I do not support allowing someone to give a constant play by play of traumatic goings-on to the entire meeting, it happens infrequently enough that it shouldn't be difficult for one of the steering committee to privately suggest to them to find a sponsor or seek outside counsel or even to point them in the direction of focusing on themselves and their recovery rather than the play by play of their qualifier. 

Is it really acceptable to banish folks to a different list just because we are uncomfortable? Or does it make much more sense to utilize that forefinger and delete the snot out of those pesky off topic posts if you just can't even? For those among us that feel guilty deleting I suggest this: work on the feelings causing that guilt; please don't expect others to change because you are having a tough go of it. We learn in Al-Anon to be responsible for our own feelings and that we can only affect change in ourselves. Perhaps this is a shining opportunity to put that into practice. BTW... I too used to feel like I had to read every single share or felt like I wasn't working my program. Then I started to get better and realized I only needed to do that which was the next right thing for me. Sometimes it's reading dozens of shares and sometimes it's wiping my inbox clean and staring anew the following day. I can't allow guilt over emails to dictate my time and frankly if I'm allowing it then I'm assuming I'm the only person in this group with the ESH to help someone in need and realistically not only do I not have that kind of power I also believe that my HP leads me to respond when someone in particular needs what I have to share. I'm just gonna go ahead and let God do God. 

Folks we have a tendency to over complicate things; and while I firmly support newbies learning and doing the work like every one of us that have gone before them and before us, there just is no reason to banish them to the outer limits. Let's give the hurting folks that we serve not only the tools to begin recovery but some compassion and guidance with how to use them and stop expecting the new kids to make us older kids feel better and so we are not inconvenienced or forced to experience any discomfort. 

Apryl