[Businessmtg] Funding/Agenda, et al

[Dawn Werezak]

Hello Everyone,

Thanks to all who have shared openly their ESH with us regarding Al-Anon issues in their areas and groups as well as with individuals.  Also thanks to those who have answered the questions asked of them, openly with this group.  That is the beauty of this process, if I do not understand something I guarantee that there is someone who has ESH in that area.  That is the beauty of Al-Anon for me as a whole.  In my life prior to Al-Anon and even early on I was afraid of new things, I did not like change, I feared controversy, I feared being seen as "not nice", I was appalled at how discussions went in our f2f business meetings at different levels and I was absolutely floored when the meeting was over these people hugged, laughed and went for lunch and talked about their weekend plans and so on.  That was a drastic difference in my life and my experiences to date.

My experiences with things that rocked the boat or direct confrontation were raised voices, personal pokes at peoples integrity or other personal characteristics, humiliation, shame, rage and anger, denial.  End result for much of that was "I am not ever speaking to you again" and sadly, that still holds true for some in my life...they don't speak to those that they vowed years ago to not speak to because of dissenting opinions on subjects.

So you can see my shock when that did not happen in my new family.  I learned how to have healthy fights with people and still like them or respect afterwards.  I learned how to let everyone have their opinions and state them without fear and wanting to run and hide in a corner and hope it would blow over and all would still be standing afterwards.  My Al-Anon family taught me that there was no need to hide in a corner and hope for the best, because our Higher Power's would ensure that the best would happen...even if it did not seem like it at that time.

I can appreciate that there are those in this meeting who are uncomfortable with some of the things being said.  I can also appreciate that there has been ESH and that was shared that rocked your boats as well.  I can also appreciate the desire to wrap this up in a pretty bow and ignore some of the things that have happened.  This is a scary process and it is a new process and guess what!  It is working.  There have been volumes of ESH shared here.  People have been able to voice their opinions, they have been able to ask questions and have them answered.  In the sharing and exchange of information other things have come to light, such as Beth stating she is a GR for another on line Al-Anon group and that she has been successful as that GR in working issues through with WSO.  Now her statement is contrary to what is in the 2006-2009 Service Manual regarding on line meetings and GR's, which I sent to this meeting.  

I am wondering how that position came about and came to be recognized by the WSO since that has not been my personal experience as an elected trusted servant of this meeting.  I am curious why anyone who has information that is valuable to our group would willing withhold that.  I also find it exciting to think that perhaps some other on line group has managed to become part of the service structure of WSO as anything more than a listed meeting.  

As I have said before in emails to this group, we are creating history here.  We have been blessed to be forging a new path and we are pioneers in the on line world of Al-Anon.  We have a recovery meeting that runs as close to a face to face meeting as we can in this format.  We have chair people who volunteer to chair a meeting and get it out to the members each day.  We have elected trusted servants that do their jobs to the best of their abilities on any given day.  We have open and honest communication with all of our members about what goes on in ASP.  Our website is updated promptly and regularly.  Our Treasurer makes regular reports and updates the info that goes on to the website almost every month.  Our Secretary oversees the chairpeople and fulfills her position.  Our Greeter Chair is a busy lady who not only manages to recruit, train new greeters but she oversees the process daily (and gets volumes of emails in her inbox every day regarding the greeting duties), she will also oversee the Literature aspect as well.  The LA position is challenging and pushes me to work the program on a daily basis and live it.  It is a busy position that takes up many more hours than I care to think about at this time.  We are blessed to have a the only founder of this meeting still with us and still very active and willing to share his wealth of ESH with us from both the on line world and from his face to face service work.  

The KBDM process is daunting because of the wealth of information that comes out of a discussion.  It takes longer and it is one that I am enjoying because I am learning a whole lot I did not know.  The KBDM process that we are using is a valuable tool for us because it lets, for lack of a better phrase, 'everything hang in the open'.  There are no secrets in this process because everyone can ask questions and more than one question, everyone can share as many times as they need to.  In my opinion as an online business meeting it is working very well.  For those that don't think so let me share some things I have been thinking about regarding this process and our business meeting.

We have 18 members.  I can think of at least four that live in different times zones from each other.  This means that when I share something although it appears in your inbox almost instantly there are time differences to take into account.  I share something and those that live in a different time zone read it when their schedules allow for it, then they share something and I read it when my schedule allows and in the meantime everyone else also shares on it and there appears to be alot of crossover and lag, but the beauty of it is, is that each person gets to experience this meeting in the context of their schedules and lives.  We all have busy lives and many of us have full time jobs/part time jobs/are parents/caregivers/volunteers in the real world and so on.  Yet as busy as our real lives are, we still are managing to share with each other on a daily and sometimes more often during the day via this meeting.  I am amazed at how it is flowing.

None of the trusted servants, I feel safe saying that even though I have not talked to them all about this, bargained for the hours that they invest in this meeting.  Steve made it look easy!  :)  and I hope we make it look easy to you all.  By following, to the best of our abilities the Traditions and Concepts in this meeting, I think we are making progress and we are giving anyone who wants to join this meeting the opportunity to have  a voice, be involved and be a part of history, for make no mistake folks we are making Al-Anon history here and I think our co-founders would be proud of us and our efforts because they were pioneers!

So are we getting nearer to the time that a motion will be called for?  I believe so.  I would like to ask each of you to take a deep breath, unwind a little and challenge yourselves to see the amazingness (not sure if that is a word) of this process we are involved in.  I continue to be amazed by its depth and breadth.  It is hard not to react and it is hard to keep principles above personalities at times on line because it is so easy to read an email and interpret it according to our perception of the words on the screen (no body language to be seen on line) and then send out an email based on our reactions.  The hard part is to have a reaction to something I read and sit with it before I respond.  I would like to think that even in this format I am being challenged to do things differently and to act in a way that I think is appropriate for me.  I get practice in the principles.  

Again, I would like to thank those who openly and honestly share their ESH with us all here.  I would like to thank those who have practiced the principles of the program, who have dug into literature to support their statements, those who have stated 'this is my opinion' and those who have read and read and read.  This is an amazing process to me and I am feel blessed to be a part of something so extraordinary.  

Love and Serenity,
Dawn